Regret is the emotion of wishing one had made a different decision in the past, because the consequences of the decision one did make were unfavorable. Regret is related to perceived opportunity. Its intensity varies over time after the decision, in regard to action versus inaction, and in regard to self-control at a particular age. The self-recrimination which comes with regret is thought to spur corrective action and adaptation. In Western societies, education is the life domain in which adults experience the highest regrets, followed by career, romance, parenting, self-improvement, and leisure.
Definition Regret has been defined by psychologists in the late 1990s as a "negative emotion predicated on an upward, self-focused, counterfactual inference". Another definition is "an aversive emotional state elicited by a discrepancy in the outcome values of chosen vs. unchosen actions". Regret differs from remorse in that people can regret things beyond their control, but remorse indicates a sense of responsibility for the situation. For example, a person can feel regret that people die during natural disasters, but cannot feel remorse for that situation. However, a person who intentionally harms someone could feel remorse for those actions. Agent regret is the idea that a person could be involved in a situation, and regret their involvement even if those actions were innocent, unintentional, or involuntary. For example, if someone decides to die by stepping in front of a moving vehicle, the death is not the fault of the driver, but the driver may still regret that the person died. Regret is distinct from disappointment. Both are negative emotional experiences relating to a loss outcome, and both have similar neuronal correlates. However, they differ in regard to feedback about the outcome, comparing the difference between outcomes for the chosen vs. unchosen action; In regret, full feedback occurs and with disappointment partial feedback. They also differ in regard to agency (self in regret versus external in disappointment).
Models There are conceptual models of regret in regret (decision theory) mostly in theoretical economics and finance under a field called behavioral economics. Anticipated regret, or how much regret one thinks one will feel in the future, appears to be overestimated for actions and choices. This appears to be, in part, due to a tendency to underestimate the extent to which people attribute bad outcomes to external factors rather than to internal factors (i.e., themselves). It can lead to inaction or inertia and omission bias. Existential regret has been specifically defined as "a profound desire to go back and change a past experience in which one has failed to choose consciously or has made a choice that did not follow one's beliefs, values, or growth needs". Instruments to measure regret in people having to make medical decisions have failed to address current concepts of regret and failed to differentiate regret from disappointment. They have also not looked for positive impacts of regret. Process regret may occur, if a person does not consider information about all available choices before making a decision. People will go out of their way to avoid regret which is called regret aversion. This can aid in the decisions one will make. However, many will go to extreme measures to avoid having to feel regret. In the book "Thinking, Fast and Slow" by Daniel Kahneman, many topics relate to regret. System one and system two thinking are systems in the mind that explain different ways people think. System one thinking is quicker and involves less effort of the mind, while system two thinking is slower and involves more effort of the mind. In both these systems, the desire to avoid regret and other negative feelings can be seen in the way decisions are made and the way people think. Loss aversion is a part of regret and regret aversion due to the way people put in the effort to not lose something. It is believed that losing something has a stronger emotional pull than gaining something does. However, this may not always be true. In 2020, a study published by three people in the Department of Psychology at King's College London researched loss aversion and how it might affect making decisions. The study suggests that depending on the circumstances and experiences loss aversion could be inaccurate.
Life domains A 2005 meta-analysis of 9 studies (7 US, one Germany, one Finland) about what adults regret most concluded, that overall adults regret choices regarding their education the most. Subsequent rankings included decisions about career, romance, and parenting. Education has been the forerunner of regret in the U.S. per Gallup surveys in 1949, 1953, and 1965. Education was the forerunner of regret because it is seen as something where circumstances could be changed: "In contemporary society, education is open to continual modification throughout life. With the rise of community colleges and student aid programs in recent decades, education of some sort is accessible to nearly all socioeconomic groups." This finding can be attributed to the principle of perceived opportunity. People´s biggest regrets are a reflection of where in life they see their largest opportunities; that is, where they see tangible prospects for change, growth, and renewal. In other cultures, regrets may be ranked differently depending on the perceived opportunity in a particular society.
In health care decisions A 2016 review of past studies found risk factors for people to develop "decision regret" regarding their health care were: higher decisional conflict, lower satisfaction with the decision, adverse outcomes in physical health, and greater anxiety levels.
Deathbed regrets A 2018 study found that people were more likely to express "ideal-related regrets", such as failing to follow their dreams and live up to their full potential. This was found to correlate with the anecdotal accounts of palliative care nurse Bronnie Ware about the most common regrets she had heard expressed by those nearing death, which included:
"I wish I'd had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me." "I wish I hadn't worked so hard." "I wish I'd had the courage to express my feelings." "I wish I had stayed in touch with my friends." "I wish that I had let myself be happier."
Determinants of intensity
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